Collared!

Is it just me, or is it a real pain at times communicating by words only? I mean words can be so ambiguous.. which is good for creativity, seduction, and misunderstandings that lead to war ... but other times can be so poor... you just want to switch on the parallel-vibe channel.

Even face to face, words are so limited... what you say is not what I hear...and I'm a good listener!... but your tone gives a clue, as does the fact that you are smiling, or crying, or punching me, or tearing your clothes off...

We are all thought-traders in this cyberspace. Maybe that's the rub. Our words don't emerge from our keyboards, they emerge from our needs, our wants, our fantasies... so a distance is preserved, or is it?

Mobile txts.. same problem, but with the option to press the speak buttons obviously.

Is there something in the middle that I'm missing?

"In search of my face, I have worn many masks.
To find my voice I have sung many songs." : J. Hough

Another interesting poster I passed .. I hope I remembered the author's name properly.

Usually I think of masks as negative things, something artificial or something that I hide behind. Here they might be considered as positive things, or is the speaker contrasting masks to songs?

Here are some thoughts from a little bit of experience. That experience doesn't make them sacred, feel free to challenge them, add to or comment...

Lots of people in unfulfilling relationships seem unable to take a step back and ask hard questions about their relationship beliefs.

Instead they hear the same old statements repeated inside their head about what should be the case.

Some.. for reasons I may suggest later...  are predisposed to associate a sense of shame to (only) themselves when these what-should-be's are not being met.

So those relationship beliefs… which you may possibly hold:

1) I believe that I am actually half of an… er… entity… e.g. I need to find my "other half", without whom I am incomplete.

2) I believe that I should not be more open about anything to anybody other than my partner.

3) I believe that a relationship should be for life.

4) I believe that a relationship can only end in hurt.

5) I believe that I cannot talk to my partner about the basis of our relationship.

6) I believe my happiness should depend on my partner.

If I can ony make one point in this post... these ideas are beliefs. More later.

Occasionally a saying appeals to me... one I saw the other day was...

The biggest fences we must climb
Are those we find
Inside our mind

or similar, Anybody know where it comes from..? (I saw it on a poster I passed)

What a strange title, perhaps not your stereotypical Oh My gawd its Monday.... no just so glad for some work to take my mind off whats going round in my head.
Matters of the heart (part of the head) to be precise.
Barbed-wire fantasies presenting themselves as cant-live-withouts?
Well found my drawing sticks and made a start. Helped a little, or did it just distract me?
Wish somebody would get on my case if it made me get off it.
Give me a good talking to.
Give me a good something.
Don't want to fall out with the world.
Just want to get my head/heart straight.
Want to look back at this post and laugh, sooner rather than later!
Apologies for being secretive, but you know how it is sometimes...

I am going to try to find the pencils and sketch pad I had to get out some of my thoughts and feelings.
I can't find the words at the moment, or should I say I am tired of the words or trying to put things in words.
But I can perhaps picture what is in my self-image.
Maybe that seems a bit rich for a blog which is based on words but if the pictures work maybe there's a way of posting them too.

There's been a lot in the mainstream radio at the moment about the revival of heavy metal..
For some of us it's been never away.
But it made me wonder if there WAS an actual revival is that the kind of thing that could be influenced or caused by astrological events.. pardon my naiveté but it's not just individuals who are affected is it?

Was playing with a couple of toy magnets today. Don't ask.  A north pole attracts a south pole and vice versa.

Does the north pole think "I feel a pull to that south pole... but I mustn't be tempted... so I'll not (make my) move."

Meanwhile, does the south pole think "I feel a pull to that north pole... but I mustn't be tempted... so I'll not (make my) move."

When the lightning strikes, has it already said to itself... I better not strike? Oh what the heck? As long as no-one gets hurt?

Oops.. couldn't help complicating that end bit.

Red wine.
Ooops almost lost it there.

It is a good idea to be open to ideas and to look around.
You don't have to be the first to have the great idea.
Nice to think others have had similar experiences.
......hmmm and they shared.
That's it.

1. Wakening without memory

Let light slowly dawn before anything else does

Can't move that way

No second thoughts

Quilt caught up…?

2. Can move that way though

Then jolt

Hey....no quilt

Can bend legs a little

That hurts

If that hurts then... mmm

 

3. Memory delight

I know where I am

Smile

I hear her coming

Smile gone

(Inside)

Just been reading a book by D. Hodson... who refers to somebody Claxton who "lists some of the more destructive beliefs about the relationship between learning and self-worth that schools often promote:
- worthwhile people do not make mistakes
- worthwhile people always know what is going on
- worthwhile people live up to, and within, their images of themselves;
- worthwhile people do not feel anxious, apprehensive or vulnerable

Because of these falsehoods, the inevitable experiences of incompetence, being confused and feeling nervous that attend any difficult and uncertain learning task can induce feelings of guilt and shame, and can seriously impair some students' self-esteem."

I blog this not cos I've "got it in for schools" but because I thought it was well written, thought provoking, and maybe more general in life.
And true of learning to make relationships. By relationships I don't mean anything necessarily heavy!