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Your Special One
by Collar @ 08. Jul. 2008. - 09:12:34

If you haven't found, or are not with, your "Special One", then what?

Do I believe deep down that the alternative to having someone out there for me who is "The One" is to have "The Zero"?

Isn't it a bit of a nightmare though, to have some "One", because that contains possession, and how can possessing somebody else possibly be right?

When I have someone in my head, who is the unfortunate target of this desire for possession, is it right for them?

Possibly.

Is it right for them in the same degree as for me?

Probably not.

But if we do have some great times together…?

Well it suits both of us at the time. That's what I mean by "getting lucky", I don't mean getting laid (though that can be a big part of it).

Do I blame a lot of loneliness on not being with "The One"… real or imaginary, when in fact it's just a case of not being at the weekend, and having to grind through the more mundane aspects of life?

And when you do have someone in your life who is close….to just hang out, to gaze into each other's eyes, to make love whenever, well that's a good a definition of heaven… till you think of others.

It's so seductive, when it's not happening… it's much better to look back on, than forward to when there is the vicious threat of something unrequited.

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MonkeyPieMonkeyPie [Member]
2008-07-08 @ 12:03

I think it's about meeting someone in the middle as opposed to owning them. Not all personalities react well to being 'owned'.
"The One" is victim of circumstance: someone who might be perfectly attuned at one stage might not be that great at another. I don't really think the alternative is The Zero so much- just maybe the 'good for the moment category'....?

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CollarCollar [Member]
2008-07-08 @ 12:33

Yeah, well put. And isn't the moment the most of what we have anyway?

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MonkeyPieMonkeyPie [Member]
2008-07-08 @ 20:50

I think appreciating the moment is the secret to happiness. That, and truth.. so yes, it's all we can hope for? Hope that doens't sound too pessimistic, I'm normally optimistic about these things but you know.. time, experience.. both great teachers.

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MeggiebeebMeggiebeeb [Member]
2008-07-08 @ 20:18

Live in the here and now. The one could be someone you bump into in line at the store, it could also be the beautiful cloudburst before the storm. We are surrounded by wonderful stimuli and it comes in many forms. Be happy just being. You are the first "one" in your existence. The one that knows all of the secrets that you can smile quietly about. I have many ones in my life and some are people that I care for deeply others are passing blips on my radar. You at this moment are special to me as I write this comment and when I read your blogs in that moment you are my one.

MissSofiaMoonMissSofiaMoon [Member]
2008-09-03 @ 13:47

I thought meggie's comment turned out very nicely. "you at this moment are special to me..." that's quite sweet, in a cynical type of way!
you do ask difficult questions!
I've never believed in the one... or at least I stopped doing so at some point that I don't remember. so I don't expect to ever find them.
it stands to reason though that in a world of billions we should be able to find someone who satisfies our particular requirements;
or is it that we are all so unique and different that finding that person in all those billions is next to impossible?
perhaps most people ain't that unique, and for them it's easy to find a match? ...
if all you want is a sausage then you can find one in every supermarket...
but if you want a really special sausage, then you may have to search a lot harder. I mean, I want a sausage with a brain and a heart, and a gorgeous face...
perhaps I'll just settle for a Walls'.

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